Set Goals, Not Resolutions

I have never really liked the idea of New Year's Resolutions.  Maybe it's because I have never been successful in the attempt.  But is anyone, really?  Don't get me wrong, there's no better time to make some changes than January 1st.  But, how you go about making the changes is much more important than the changes you plan to make, don't you think?  Especially if you truly want to be successful.  That is why I have decided to make a list of goals for the new year, and say NO to resolutions.  Some goals are very specific, and some fall more in the "to-do" category. But all have a place for one big fat check mark once they are complete.   I ran this idea by my hubby not long ago, and he loved the idea as well.  So we sat down and brainstormed some ideas together.  We now have a very solid list of things we want to accomplish in 2014.  It also gave us some much needed bonding time...you know, where we actually had a conversation.  Talk about pumping yourself up for the next 12 months! 

I admit, it was hard for me to get started because I felt the need to add everything I have ever wanted to do to my goal list. But you have to start small and focus on what is most important.  If you don't, you will find yourself with a ginormous list, and end up feeling overwhelmed and exhausted before you even get started.  And no one wants that.  This is the year to 'Say Goodbye to Survival Mode' after all!  And while we're on the subject...  Crystal Paine has some fantastic ideas in her blog post 'How to Change Your Life by Setting Goals'.  She nails it on the head by saying:

"...without goals, you have nothing that you’re aiming for. And complacency and floundering are often the result."

I couldn't agree more.  Sometimes I feel as if she writes what I am thinking (and planning on writing).   I talk about her as if we have discussed these topics over lattes at Starbucks (one can only dream), but that's what I love about her blog and her new book.  Keep that in mind while setting your goals.  And if you need some extra help and encouragement, here are a few of mine:

• Run a 10K
• Read a little every day, with a goal to complete: The Energy Bus, Loving the Little Years, Cha Cha Chandler Teen Demonologist, and daily devotions)
• Have our Pastor and his family over for dinner
• Spend more time with friends and family (dinner party, poker night, spa day, Columbia trip)
• Cross the finish line at a Tough Mudder
• Bring the boys to volunteer with us at our next Special Olympics event

 

 

Since my goal of running a 10K is much more defined than getting in shape, for instance, it gives me that sense of accomplishment when I cross it off my list.  While getting in shape is the result I hope to get, it allows me to have something specific to work towards.  Who knows, maybe next year I'll be adding a half marathon to the list...  

 

So now that I have you to hold me accountable, I hope you will follow along with me through the year as I work towards these goals.   And I wish you much success in reaching your goals in 2014, as well as a blessed and happy new year!   

 



7 Day Challenge

As most of you know, I am honored to be a member of the launch team for Crystal Paine's new book, Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, coming out in January.  If you haven't been following Crystal and her website, Money Saving Mom, then you are totally missing out!!  I myself was late to the game having only started following her a few months ago...just in time to apply for the launch team.  Funny how that works out, huh?  Thanks, Lord!  :)  I am only on chapter 6 and I have already been so inspired by her words of wisdom, I can only imagine where the remaining chapters will take me.  As a sneak peak to her fans, she has offered a FREE 7 day challenge to get you started.  I have taken the challenge, so here is my report card so far. 

Day 1: Learn To Say NO

As women, saying no to things can be a foreign concept.  But if we said yes to every obligation, we leave no time for ourselves and our family, and will find ourselves feeling tired and overwhelmed.  Hmmm, guilty!! 

"If we want to say goodbye to survival mode, we need to make time for what really matters. This means we have to clear out the nonessential commitments. The fastest way to do this? Learn to say no."

Crystal goes on to suggest that we look at our list and cross some things off.  Not by completing them, but saying NO.  I, for instance, have had one large item on my to-do list that I have been dreading for quite sometime....the family budget.  We recently met with our financial planner and got a swift kick to the gut when we crunched the numbers for college and retirement saving.  We needed to take a hard look at our spending and make some changes.  Not only is budgeting not my area of expertise, I just simply don't have the time to devote to it.  So I have passed that task along to my hubby.  He works so hard, and often travels so I find myself just adding items to my list in order to take them off his.  Once we talked about it, however, we not only agreed that it was not a good use of my time, but that he would be much more suited for this task.  Saying no to something from my list was a good lesson, but asking for help when I needed it was just as good.  Cheers to that!

 

Day 2: Focus On Your Strengths

 

 

It's no secret that I am lacking in the self confidence department, but I'm working on it (and making major improvements, thanks to this book!).  So I have to admit this was hard for me.  But when I sat down, I used this as a helpful reminder: 

A Word of Caution: Beware of your negative language. It’s very sneaky, but can do so much damage. You know, you may be sitting in front of your computer trying to beat the clock and meet a deadline and think, “I’m so slow. I wish I were as productive as Jenn. I’ll never be able to finish this on time.” Stop right there! Remove from your vocabulary sentences that start with, “I can’t . . . ,” “I’ll never be able to . . . ,” and “I’m not good enough at . . .” These words don’t set you up for success. They only trap you in self-sabotage and eventual defeat.

After 10 minutes (and maybe recruiting some help from my hubby) it was refreshing to have a solid list of strengths I could begin to focus on.  And I have found a special place for that list as a daily reminder until I no longer need a reminder!

 

 

 

Day 3: Budget Your Time

 

This is one thing that I struggled with as a new Homemaker.  It was so easy to get into bad habits, and oh-so-hard to get out of them.  The biggest problem was (is) our morning routine.  I call myself the Queen of Excuses lately and this was definitely one of them.  Cooper likes to get up before the sun comes up, so that was my excuse to skip or put off so many things.  It was so much easier to curl up with him on the couch, and often fall back asleep.  A morning workout?  Skip!  Laundry?  Delay!  And so on.  Not to mention, I would wake up feeling more tired and cranky than I did when I originally woke up at 5:00.  Talk about a total day-killer!  Crystal agrees: 

 

I usually am most productive in the mornings so I make it my goal to go to bed by 10 p.m. and get up between 5 and 6 a.m. This way I have plenty of uninterrupted time in the morning for everything on my list. You might be the other way around. Do what works best for you, but by putting rest high up on your priority list, I guarantee you’ll feel better, have more energy, and be more efficient during the day.

 

Instead of taking one day, I took a few days to complete this part of the challenge.  That is one of the things I like most about the book.  There are so many suggestions to fit your needs and Crystal encourages her readers to always do what's best for their situation.  Taking a few days was a major help to ease me in, and I am now ready to start my morning routine.  So here it goes...

 

• Wake up (by alarm clock known as Cooper)
• Read a daily devotion
• Physical activity (run/yoga/strength)
• Make breakfast
• Get Cooper ready for school

I know it doesn't seem like a lot, but it sure beats dozing off on the couch, don't you think?  :)

 

 

 

So here is a look at the first 3 days of the challenge...I don't want to overwhelm you with too much information all at once.  Or spoil the surprise!! :)  So if you think this can work for you, I encourage you to sign up for this FREE challenge yourself and let me know how you do.  And stay tuned for days 4, 5,6 & 7 coming up on the blog soon as I 'Say Goodbye to Survival Mode'.  Also, if you pre-order your copy of the book you can get tons of freebies and discounts.  I promise you won't be disappointed! 

 

 



 

 



Why Are There No Pictures of Mommy?

This is a very interesting topic.  And one I have my sister-in-law, Jenny, to thank for bringing it to my attention.  It started while we were at the annual Pattonville homecoming parade.  The floats were starting to approach, so the kids and I grabbed a spot on the curb for some prime candy catching.  It was then that Jenny attempted to snap a picture of the candy crew.  But I'm sure you can guess what happened next.  I bolted off of that curb so fast, you would have thought it was on fire.  Sound familiar?  She then proceeded to tell me a story about how a son thought his mother was beautiful, but didn't have many pictures of her to remember her by.  So sad, right?  (I'm sure I did not do any justice to the real story, but hopefully you get the idea.)

This instantly hit home with me.  Not only do I become an Olympic gymnast in order to avoid a picture, I am also usually the one behind the camera (um, iPhone).  Which is why there is an abundance of pictures of the boys with Daddy.  But the real reason for pictures is not for Facebook or Instagram (although they are great ways to keep in touch with friends and family), but are meant to be memories to treasure for a lifetime, and then passed on to your children to treasure through their lifetime.  So what will they have to cherish years from now if we continue to resist the camera?  Sure you have the professional family photos, and the ones taken over the holidays, but what about the yoga pants, no make-up, dance party pictures?   I am so blessed to be able to spend all of this precious time with my boys, but I know I will eventually regret not capturing these special moments once they are grown up and too busy (or too cool) to just sit and snuggle with me.

Definitely a lessoned learned, thanks to the wise words of one Jennifer Stranghoener!  And since then, I have started making an effort to take more pictures of us, just living.  Doing the things we love.  Snuggling in bed on Friday mornings when we don't have to get dressed for school.  Curled up on the couch watching a movie on a rainy afternoon (pictured below...no make-up and all.  Eeek!!) .  Helping Mommy cook in the kitchen.  Playing at our favorite park.  Reading the Kids' Bible Stories book together before bed.  Those are the moments that bring so much joy to my life and I want the boys to be able to share the joy of seeing their Mommy snuggling, playing, and cooking with them for years to come (make-up or not).  :)

 

Why Are We so Hard on Ourselves?!

I've known this for a while.  That I'm hard on myself, that is.  But isn't it true that it takes on an entirely new meaning when you become a wife?  And especially when you become a mother?  As if we didn't have enough going on to worry about not doing a good job.  The house isn't clean enough...I don't serve enough healthy meals...I raise my voice one too many times....the list goes on and on.

 I remember the moment I noticed this feeling as if it were yesterday.  It was when a friend of mine (and a fellow mommy) told me what a good mom I was because I played nursery rhyme CDs in the car.  Can you guess what my response was?  I believe it went something like this, "Well, I don't know about that, but thank you."  Really??  Why can't the "thank you" come before the "I don't know about that"?  And why does the "I don't know about that" have to come at all?   Are you guilty of the "I don't know about that"?

And what about the insincere thank you?  My husband can relate.  Here I am depriving myself of tasty calories...um, wine...in order to shed a few...um, several...pounds.  He is my biggest cheerleader and I love him dearly, but for some reason as soon as he tries to pay me a compliment, I completely shrug him off as if he's just doing me a favor.  Eventually he's going to stop trying and I wouldn't blame the poor guy if he did.  I will smile and tell him thank you, but if I don't actually believe it, then what difference does it make?  So this is for all of you women.  Mommies or not... 

You are doing a great job! 
You are beautiful!

Now you (and I) just have to start believing it!!   No more being hard on ourselves.  No more "I don't know about that".  And definitely no judging other moms.  This job is hard enough and we should be supporting one another through every step.  I say we take a stand and make a conscience effort to praise ourselves for all that we are doing right and stop focusing on what we think we're doing wrong.  Isn't that what our kids would want?  Our husbands?  And don't we truly want that for ourselves?  Take the challenge with me.  God is in control anyway and He won't let you down!

And remember...  :)

Fall Family Traditions

I love fall, I mean LOVE fall!  And I have come to love it more as we start new family traditions.  In the spirit of Halloween, here is a little glimpse of some of my favorite fall activities!

 

Eckert's

 

I have some great memories of apple picking with my parents and siblings, so I wanted to start that same tradition with my family.  We asked...forced...Daddy to take a day off work to spend the day with us.  He works so hard for us and doesn't take many days off, so I wanted to plan a day dedicated to some family fun...just the four of us!  The idea started with a day at the pumpkin patch, but then we decided to make the most of his day off and head to Eckert's.  Out of the three Eckert's locations, we chose Graffton.  I'm pretty sure you can't make a bad choice out of the 3, but we were definitely happy with our choice.  It started with a scenic drive and a ferry ride across the river.  And that was just the beginning!  Once we got there, we had a hard time deciding what to do first.  From the tractor ride, to the pumpkin and apple picking, all the way to the animals, and playground, we had an absolute blast!  And of course Daddy had to get the biggest pumpkin they had!  Although it was a perfect morning, next year we will pack lunch for a picnic, or visit the location with the restaurant (which I've heard is amazing) so we can spend more time there.  Follow them on Facebook to stay up-to-date on all deals and special events! 

 

 

 

 

Pumpkin Painting Party

 

 

So now we have a carload (literally) of pumpkins, so what are we to do with all of them?  Well, have a pumpkin painting party of course!  I started doing this last year because, let's be honest, I love any excuse for a girls night.  Little did I know how much fun it was going to be.  And obviously we had to do it bigger and better this year.  I asked the guests to BYOP and bring anything special to make their masterpiece.  I provided the paint, paintbrushes, some carving tools, and of course, the boos booze.  I also made tortilla soup, which is one of our favorite fall soups (I will be sharing the recipe, so stay tuned).  I have some pretty creative friends, so I was very excited to see what was in store, and they certainly did not disappoint!  As you will see, we represented our hometown teams quite well!  And my Mom's "designer pumpkins" were the talk of Facebook!  I again took some notes and for next year I think I'm going to ship the kids off with Daddy to have some fun outside of the house so I can play hostess.  I will plan a separate painting party dedicated to the boys, and possibly their cousins too.  That way I can focus more on helping them with the Monsters Inc./kid friendly  pumpkins  and worry less about who's pumpkin they just added some color to.  :)  All in all, this is one of my favorite events and if you aren't doing it already, I highly recommend it!  And maybe next year I will have time to do something creative with the carload of apples... We'll see!!

Oh, and also next year, I will photograph the carved pumpkins at night!! ;)

 

 

 

Photo credit to Kelly Sahrmann (Bird on the bat/St. Louis Arch) 

Mizzou 'M' by Jenny Stranghoener. 

Orange Buttons and Spotted pumpkin by Momma (not pictured: Fancy 'H'). 

Mizzou Tiger Paw by Nikki Nill. 

Painted Carving and unfinished STL done by yours truly.

Mommy's: Spider web Mizzou 'M', STL Baseball, and Painted Carving.

Daddy's: The Monster (The picture does no justice, it is huge!)

Boys: Mike Wazowski (with a little help from Mommy)

 

Pumpkin cheese ball courtesy of my Momma. 

Contact me for the recipe.  Not only is it adorable, it is yummy!!

 

 

 

Tortilla Soup 

 

Is there really anything better than a simmering pot of soup and a fire crackling in the fire place on a cool fall day?  I didn't think so.  While I love chili, I had to find another recipe that I could throw into the rotation...and one my hubby would like.  And thanks to Pinterest, I found the perfect fall soup that makes everyone drool!  So many people have asked me for the recipe, so why hold out on the rest of you?  Bonus!  You make it in the crockpot!!  Easy and delicious?  Yes please!  I have since deleted the pin, so unfortunately I am not able to give credit to the original post, but I will share the recipe with you without taking the credit!  I was not prepared for this one, so I only have one picture that I sent to my pal Nikki to make her hungry as it was cooking.  Aren't I a great friend??  It doesn't look appetizing, but I promise you, it's delicious!

 

 

 

 

 

Ingredients:

2 tbs olive oil

2 medium onions, diced

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 qt. chicken stock

1 tbs chicken soup base

2 tsp cumin

2 tsp chili powder

1/2 tsp black pepper

1/4 tsp cayenne pepper

1 8oz can tomato sauce

1 19oz can enchilada sauce

6 small tortillas, minced

16oz velveta, cubed

1 cup Colby-jack chesse

1 bag Tyson chicken, diced (I used shredded chicken breasts)

1 can whole corn (I leave this out and set it out as a topping)

*garnish with sour cream, tortilla strips, and cheese*

 

Directions:

1. In a skillet, heat olive oil and sauté onions until tender

2. Add minced garlic and cook another min or two, then scrape into crockpot

3. Add all other ingredients, except the chicken and corn

4. Cook over high heat for two hours, or low for 4 hours

5. whisk until smooth (tip: I make mine the night before so the tortillas absorb the flavor)

6. Add chicken and corn if desired and heat through, approx. 30 minutes-1 hour

Bon Appetit!

 

 

 

 

There you have it!  I hope you have enjoyed a few of my favorite fall festivities, and please feel free to share some of yours with me!

 

 

 

HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 



 

 



Mommy's Favorite Things

I recently shared a couple of my favorite things with a few of my friends, so it prompted me to want to share them with all of you too!  Whether you're a mommy or not, this is some good stuff!!

1. UP by JAWBONE

 

 

This is by far one of my most favorite things.  I have my good mate, Mike to thank for introducing me to this little gem.  It's a wristband that not only tracks your activity by number of steps you take, it also yells at you if you have been idle too long...as in "get up you lazy bum"!  Nothing proves how hard a stay at home mom works when she's logging almost 11,000 steps just on a normal day!  But one of the coolest features is the sleep monitoring.  In the morning you can see how log it took you to fall asleep the night before, how long you were in light vs. deep sleep, and...wait for it...it also wakes you up when you are in your lightest sleep!  No more waking up feeling groggy when your alarm goes off (or a toddler barges in your room) in the middle of a dream.  Simply download the app, add your personal info, and begin.  You don't even know it's there.  Bonus!  You can also link it with other apps, such as Run Keeper and My Fitness Pal (which are also favorite things of mine).  I could go on and on, but instead, feel free to read more or order online here.

2. PLEDGE MULTI SURFACE

 

 

Every mom, or woman for that matter, needs a handy helper in the cleaning department.  Mine is Pledge Multi Surface.  Since it can be used on almost any surface, there are countless uses for this bad boy, and I find myself using all throughout the house!  In the kitchen, for instance, I use it to clean the glass-top table, the sliding glass door (sticky fingerprints), the outside of the fridge (more sticky fingerprints), and the cabinets.  And if you're using the antibacterial product, you can also use it on countertops.  That's a whole lot of efficiency in one room.  Just think how much I get done in the family room!  I can clean and dust the tables, picture frames and the TV stand.  And since it can be used for electronics, I can also clean the TV.  The list goes on and on.  If you want to give it a try, Target even has a coupon available on their website you can get by clicking here!  (More to come on Target, so stay tuned!)

3. SRUBBING BUBBLES WIPES

 

 

Speaking of cleaning.  I also get a lot of use out of the Scrubbing Bubbles wipes.  I keep some under the sink in every bathroom for quick and easy access.  One of the common misconceptions about a stay at home mom, is that she has all day to clean.  It's actually really hard to clean during the day with two toddlers running around, that I just have to fit it in when I can.  So while the boys are finishing their bath, for instance, I just pull out the container and go to work.  And since I keep them under the sink, I never have to leave the room!  This helps me a lot when I don't always have time to do a complete house cleaning...especially in a bathroom used by boys!!!

Reminder: Make sure cabinets that store cleaning products have child-proof locks!



4. CLOSET CANDY BOUTIQUE

I have come to love boutiques!  They all have so many unique and cute clothes and accessories, but my favorite boutique is Closet Candy.  Anyone who knows me knows that I lived in my maxi dresses this summer.  And if you saw their stuff,  you would know why!  Sure, there are definitely those days where "getting dressed" is putting on yoga pants, but on the days where you want to be cute and comfortable, maybe run a few errands, I grab my Closet Candy.  Go to their website and like them on Facebook to check out all of the end of summer deals.  Not to mention the A-dorable college gameday collection!

5. SEPHORA BRONZER

 

 

 

 

I never thought I would say this in a million years, but most days I don't feel like wearing (wasting) make-up.  But I also don't want to scare the pants of anyone who might happen to ring the doorbell or see me outside watering the lawn.  So my solution is bronzer by Sephora.  These days, there are a million bronzers out there.  But what I love about Sephora's product is that it's not too greasy and doesn't smell like you just fell off the Banana Boat.  I also have yet to have it streak or get blotchy, which is key when you are applying bronzer yourself.   I ordered mine online a few months ago, and not only received free shipping, but also received 3 free samples.    

6. CARTWHEEL by TARGET

 

 

 

Ok, here is the one you have been waiting for!  I know I have already shared this beauty before, but I could not leave it off of my favorite things list.  And I didn't want to take a chance on anyone missing out on it.  Thanks to my amazing friend, Amber, I started using Cartwheel about two weeks ago and I am in love!  It is a free app that allows you to select certain deals and instantly save on the things you are already buying.  Here's the best part.  All of the deals you select will use one barcode.  So if you are terrible at remembering to bring or use your coupons (like me) this is your solution to save.  Once you are at the checkout, simply hand your phone (or a printed copy) over for one quick little scan and, voila!  Instant savings.  So let's review how you should be shopping at Target.  Add your deals to Cartwheel, use any additional coupons you brought, and swipe your Red Card for an additional 5% off.  You now have just saved enough to buy that dress you've been eyeing at CCB!  Pretty simple stuff huh?  Thanks again, Amber!!

 

 

 

While this list could go on and on, I will stop here...mainly because my UP band just told me to get my blogging booty out of this chair.  But I would like to ask you to share any of your mommy-must-haves with me.  That's what this is about after all...to share, learn and laugh with each other, right? :)  Thanks for stopping by and I look forward to reading your comments on this one!!

Good Mom. Bad Friend?

When you have kids, your life quickly becomes all about them.  The first person you neglect is yourself...naturally.  The second person is your husband.  Poor guy!!  And the third is more of a group than an individual.  And it happens to be your friends.  It is only natural, and it goes away after the initial shock of parenthood sets in, right?  Wrong!  Sure, no one expects you to be a stellar friend the day you pop the kid out, or even the days after, but what about when the kid(s) are two...three perhaps?  Well that's another story...

I have been blessed over the years to have made many great friends.  Some have been in my life for many years, and others have come into my life just in the past couple of years.  Friendships are funny that way.  Your first friends are in the neighborhood, or on your CYC soccer team perhaps.  Next comes grade school continuing all the way through your college years.  Then you have a career and meet new friends at the office.  There are also the "wives"...you know, the couples.  And eventually there are the moms.  Real Housewives of St. Louis??

It goes through a cycle, like most things in life, I guess.  It's easy to catch up with a mommy friend at playgroup or a tee-ball game, but what about those close friends that have been there for you countless times throughout the years?  Is it safe to say that we neglect the ones we love the most because we know they'll be there no matter what?  Regardless of the reason, I know I have never been great at reaching out first, but it got even worse when I became a mom.  Call it tiredness, call it forgetfulness, call it whatever you want.  Whatever the cause, it's not the kind of friend I want to be.  I'm not saying it's realistic to have an hour-long phone conversation while your kids are arguing about who gets to sit where, or pouring an entire box of Lucky Charms on the floor (true story).  Not to mention the fact that the person you are talking to might think you are suffering from a bout of tourettes.  It goes something like this... "Did you watch Big Broth...Get your hand out of the toilet...Aaryn is such a...Stop choking your brother..."  (I can't take credit for the reference!  Like all good things, it came from Pinterest!)

So, a phone call might not always be an option, but a simple text can go a really long way!  You can even do it while the kids are asleep, or eating lunch.  Another idea would be a hand written note in the mail.  Gasp!  Mail?  I know it sounds silly, but a card mixed in with the bills could totally make someone's day.  You're at Target at least once a week anyway, just pick up a card while you're on your way to the diaper aisle.  I am the worst at all of this stuff by the way, but I cherish all of my friendships so much, that I strive and challenge myself to be better at it.  Don't get me wrong, a good old fashioned girls happy hour is not only fun, but occasionally necessary.  But in those moments where, let's say for instance, your hubby is traveling for the third time that month, or you already used one of your babysitters just so you could attend your board meeting.  Foregoing the evening out to get together at someone's house is still getting together.  And seeing your friends chasing, tickling and cuddling with your kids is an added bonus because in my opinion, it's priceless!  And for goodness sake!  Stop worrying about what a mess the house is!  And yes, I am mainly talking to myself.  First of all, your friends could care less, and second of all, if we only let people come over when the house was actually clean, we would never see anyone! 

So, bottom line...being a good/busy/involved mom does not make us bad friends, it only means we just might have to make a little bit more of an effort than we did before we became moms.  And if you have friends like mine, that extra effort is totally worth it!